Anti-I.Q. I.Q.

Have you ever taken an IQ test? I know given the “opportunity”, I’d bomb it, even with a sense of pride, given my skepticism towards the value of such a test. But when I saw the New Yorker cartoon IQ test, I couldn’t pass up the chance.  After all, cartoons are funny, and humor IQ is probably the anti-IQ IQ. The ones below aren’t  funny as New Yorker cartoons go, and I missed one, but not enough to keep me from blogging this.

CARTOON I.Q. TEST: I DON'T GET IT!

Here are five recent cartoons that confounded our readers. It’s up to you to determine whether the original rationale is any less silly than the others.

You answered 4 out of 5 questions correctly.

1.



(a) "Airy" is a terrible consistency for meatballs. Ideally, you want them to be dense and chewy.

(b) She is being sarcastic. The meatballs have made her sick and now she is off to the hospital, posthaste.

(c) In high society, it is impolite to speak ill of meatballs, no matter how over spiced they may be.

(d) It is funny that meatballs were served at such a fancy dinner party.

Correct. You answered D.

2.



(a) The cowboy just realized the terrible faux pas he made earlier by calling the Native Americans "Indians."

(b) The cowboys' enemies are lighting the arrows in order to burn down the nearby rocks and cactus.

(c) The enemies are lighting their arrows, but, for the cartoon to make sense, the men should have been in a fort or some other structure that can actually burn down.

(d) These cowboys are spying on Native Americans who are attacking some other cowboys, in a faraway fort.

Incorrect. The correct answer is C.

3.



(a) The two woman are suffering from heat stroke—they actually believe that they are eighty years old.

(b) Just as "hang ten" refers to a surfing maneuver, "turning eighty" is young people's slang for playing in the water.

(c) Modern technology and plastic surgery have made eighty the new thirty.

(d) Each woman is turning forty years old, for a combined age of eighty.

Correct. You answered C.

4.



(a) The text was not meant to be printed in the magazine but, rather, is a reminder that the artist wrote to himself about his podiatrist appointment next week.

(b) Life is short and precious. It's important to get outside and enjoy nature, especially on Tuesdays around ten.

(c) Hats are making a resurgence, and one man is not happy about it.

(d) The cartoon is poking fun at the interchangeability of events. Next Tuesday around ten is the same as next Friday around four.

Correct. You answered D.

5.



(a) In lovemaking, as in all things, practice makes perfect.

(b) Yoga is so popular these days it's everywhere—even in the bedroom.

(c) Sometimes spouses can be deliberately and aggravatingly passive-aggressive.

(d) The man represents Obama and the woman represents McCain, or vice versa.

Correct. You answered C.

Pasted from <http://www.newyorker.com/humor/polls/cartoonidontgetit/081103sh_shouts/results/?entryId=7456076>

http://alexlittlefield.com/blog.aspx

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Every day is February 14 around me, right?  Love ‘ya  Mrs. Littlefield.

Funnier than Fiction

The following two im chats speak for themselves. Below is a perfect example of the bunglers in charge of customer service/ sales representatives in large organizations. The first chat log is between HP and me, and the second between a chappie and me finding humor in the botched sale. A follow up telly call to the "correct" HP department also fizzled after I was transferred to a dark hole in the HP system. Enjoy.

(Chat 1) HP Chat Session Log

This is an automated email sent from the HP Home & Home Office Store Server. The following information is a log of your session. Please save the log for your records. Your session ID for this incident is 473822.
Time	Details
*07:25:33AM	Session Started with Agent (Donna)
*07:25:33AM	Alex Littlefield: "Order declined, but my bank shows HP deduction, what gives?"
*07:25:39AM	Agent (Donna): "Thank you for contacting HP Home & Home Office Store chat."
*07:25:51AM	Agent (Donna): "My name is Donna."
*07:26:03AM	Alex Littlefield: "Hi."
*07:26:39AM	Alex Littlefield: "Order declined, but my bank shows HP deduction, what gives?"
*07:26:40AM	Agent (Donna): "I understand that you encountered a problem while trying to place an order online."
*07:27:08AM	Agent (Donna): "I apologize for the inconvenience."
*07:27:15AM	Alex Littlefield: "POS Debit - Visa Check Card 1379 - HP HOME STORE 888-999-4747 COUS $1,073.13-"
*07:27:19AM	Agent (Donna): "I am more than willing to assist you."
*07:27:44AM	Agent (Donna): "Do you have an existing account here in HP?"
*07:27:58AM	Alex Littlefield: "My account was debited, but HP said order denied?!"
*07:28:09AM	Alex Littlefield: "No, just this order."
*07:28:18AM	Agent (Donna): "OK."
*07:28:47AM	Agent (Donna): "Your order encountered a system decline."
*07:29:15AM	Agent (Donna): "I suggest that you call HP Customer Service Department."
*07:29:26AM	Alex Littlefield: "Well it was happy to deduct from my bank before declining!?"
*07:29:33AM	Agent (Donna): "They will be the one to assist you on your purchase."
*07:29:41AM	Alex Littlefield: "Duh, who are you then?"
*07:29:58AM	Alex Littlefield: "What's the point of this chat?!"
*07:30:18AM	Agent (Donna): "I am a Sales Representative from HP."
*07:30:42AM	Agent (Donna): "Do not worry on the charges."
*07:30:42AM	Alex Littlefield: "Whatever. Ciao."
*07:30:50AM	Agent (Donna): "It is only a temporary charge."
*07:31:03AM	Agent (Donna): "The credit will be back to your account."
*07:31:25AM	Agent (Donna): "Is there anything else I can assist you with today?"
*07:31:43AM	Alex Littlefield: "Yipee! No thank you."
*07:32:03AM	Agent (Donna): "I noticed you did not purchase an Extended Warranty on your previous order, Alex."
*07:32:20AM	Session Ended

(Chat 2)

me: HP cust. service is freaky! I just tried to buy a computer. I'll send you the chat in email. Funny in a sorry way.

Michael: good

me: There seems to be a delay in my responses to "Donna's" questions. I think I'll blog this chat.

Michael: hillarious

Michael: that's funny man just funny

me: They just turned down cold cash. Freaks!

Michael: send the chat log to their customer support and then a corresponding receipt of your mac purchase

me: No, I'm buying a tablet.

Michael: good call

me: For the last 3 years that has been my mantra. Want inking support.

Michael: that chat stream was amazing

D’ya Know the Fonts?

Alex Littlefield

Alex Littlefield

Alex Littlefield

Alex

LITTLEFIELD

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Alex Littlefield

Summary of my Master's Thesis in Chinese

 

Professor 李福隆 (Matt Lee) summarized my master's thesis in Chinese. This presentation was May 10 at the 2008 真理大學(Aletheia University)  國際經貿學術研討會議程. I first presented it in English but no video of that part of the presentation.  One paper down and maybe many more to go since I my press on for yet more skool'n.  The topic of this thesis is a international relations theory approach to the (WTO) TRIPS conflict, which was no fun to write and surely less fun to read.  But Professor Lee did a great job explaining my thesis and we only met the day of the conference with no prior discussion.

Technorati Tags: education,thesis,aletheia university

Buying Bikes Directly from Giant Factory

Technorati Tags: Giant,Decathalon,cycling,Taiwan

 

Joshua from Sawyer, MI and anyone else who is wondering:   I didn't see any sort of retail bike sales at the Giant bike factory in Da Ya, Taichung County.  But there is an outdoors store called "Together" in Taichung City on Wen Xin RD and Wu Chuan West RD, which is run by Giant and the prices on the bikes are pretty good.  The store sells Scott as well since Giant is Scott's  OEM.  Last year they had a carbon mountain bike MCM V LTD for about USD$680 with Rock Shocks suspension (See Photo).  Wish I bought the MCM then, can't find it anymore, the bike or the price. Well the bike certainly lived up to it's namesake LTD, just too limited for me.  If you like Decathalon mountain bikes, they also have a store nearby.

Self Destructive Companies

We've all run into our share of self destructive companies.  Usually only the ones with government life support manage to linger.  This morning I ran into a suicidal company.  Ironically, this is a newspaper company, and last time I heard the industry as a whole is hurting for subscribers.   For my part, I'm a willing and enthusiastic customer of one of the print products (yes paper) but alas it seems the company is doing its damndest to turn away my coin.    The below email only reveals some of my ordeal.  Not wanting to be mean, I'll protect the identity of the newspaper.

Sir/Madam:
I want to buy 6 months Anywhere Post: Weekly Student Magazine and my tracer number is
Tracer # 090809L315

How can you take credit card information over an non-secure proxy?  No way, will I send correct credit card info. over http.  It's just unbelievable your company doesn't provide https. 

Further your site crashed on me 4 times as I was entering my order information.   Welcome to 2008 please put 1994 behind you and your customers.  What an unpleasant and risky experience, totally unacceptable.  

Also I don't want the CD, just the magazine (2 copies per week), but that isn't an option. 

Lastly, I want to buy additional copies as needed (for my students) directly from 7-11, but went to many stores and none of them stock said paper despite the 7-11 logo on your paper indicating it is available at 7-11.

Seriously, you need to get your act together; or is your company intentionally trying to self destruct?

        Sincerely,  Alex

Technorati Tags: marketing,business

Get in the game and smack that blasted wiffle ball.

Technorati Tags: sentimental,motivational,inspirational

No 3 strikes and you’re out in life. Duh. So then why do people stop swinging at the blasted ball? Swung and hit a lot of air, missed opportunities, characterized many a game no longer played. There’s no need to fret too much if one hits that single early or late in the game. New pitches are always there, but you’ll have to come back up to the base and be willing to swing at air and look foolish again and again. Hey and don’t swing like a madman, go for a single. Hah! Why nothing grander? A simple splendid single, standing out in a stadium full of spectators, is perfect enough. Life doesn’t need to be all or nothing. If one is after a home run (early in life) or nothing, then he will likely get nothing. Perhaps missed a home run in your so called prime? Surely, you know more than you did then, so shouldn’t that increase your chance of success this time around? Be conservative (realistic?) with your goals, but not conservative to the point of not participating. Moses wasn’t 80 until he was called to confront Pharaoh and liberate the Hebrews.  So, dear sir, swing at that wiffle ball till you hit it.  And no need to take yourself or life too seriously, have fun swinging at the wiffle ball of life while there's still breath in you.

(After writing this motivational piece I realize it looks a lot like those maudlin e-mails that get forwarded; at least I’m not emailing it to anyone and it is a product of my own sentimental thought.)

Kansas City Star Tribute

Click on the above newspaper article image to enlarge .

A Young Man's Life (.wmv)

The video montage of Luke was made by a good friend of his. My Dad has a cameo in one of the pictures, he was intentionally looking mentally retarded (literally). All in good fun.

This video format is for Windows Media Player.

Luke, You're a Good Sport.

Here are some (not all) of my photos and videos of Luke. Out of respect for his family's privacy, I've only posted ones of him solo or with my posse. These photos and videos were taken January 2006 in Kansas City and December 2006 in Taiwan. He visited again April 2007 but I only got a few pictures when we visited the Doulos. We did a lot together on the April visit, but then I didn't bother taking any pictures. Thanks Luke for being a good sport; I never once heard you complain in any circumstances, and you never objected to having your picture taken.

del.icio.us Tags: luke,doulos